


Life is Short (So Why Bother?)

by easily obsessed fanperson (orphan_account)



Category: Original Work
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-21
Updated: 2017-10-21
Packaged: 2019-01-20 13:32:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 6,333
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12433908
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/easily%20obsessed%20fanperson
Summary: Short Stories, Poems, and Other Thingamabobs





	1. Contents

**Author's Note:**

> i just want to dump it here sorry, i hope you don't mind

This "booklet" is made of up of:

 

 

a little call of warning

+

a young fogey

+

a sprinkling of comedy

+

a bucketload of tragedy

+

a bunch of baloney

 

 

Also, some

B.S.


	2. a little call of warning...

First things first, I want to tell you that this "booklet" WILL NOT change your life. I’m telling you, this cannot offer you some age-old wisdom; you can go to Buddha or Gandhi for that. (Although, the person who is responsible for this is also fat and asian.) So if that’s what you’re looking for, sorry, it’s just not here.

Second, this is not a source of fine literature as this is just from the mind of some random ignorant, unknowledgeable, unenlightened, uneducated, unschooled, untaught, untutored, untrained, uninstructed, uninformed, unread, unlearned, clueless, nescient person who - unfortunately and surprisingly - is familiar with the use of a thesaurus. If that’s what you want, then pore over Shakespeare or the Code of Hammurabi or something.

Lastly, reading this may evoke some emotions or reactions in you such as happiness, sadness, annoyance, exasperation, weariness, restlessness, etc. (Or not, i don’t know, you may be lacking of empathy to experience such things.) So if you don’t want that, just abandon this booklet and never look back.

If, after reading the previous paragraphs, you’re still willing to continue to the succeeding pages, then go forth and read. Just keep it mind that you’ve been warned. Don't blame me. That’s it. Come on, hurry along, turn to the next part!


	3. a young fogey

_What the Future Holds_

Like a rainbow every after storm

My hopes exist in an entirely different norm

Oh what surprise the future holds

To my mind as it slowly unfolds

A doctor, a wife, even a mother

Time will come I will soon discover

What does my destiny really spell

For my life only God can tell

My mind's all set but my heart's unwell

'Coz in the past is where it still dwells

Remembering the good times that we once had

All those memories would still make me glad

In God's time the best I will be

Just wait a while we'll all finally see

The things that will happen I will embrace

And use it in life with style and grace

 

 

 

_A Precious Gem_

A friend means you'll always be there

Makes you face things that you couldn't bare

Things like fear, oh that would be nothing

When you're with him, you can do anything

Rain or shine, he'll go the extra mile

To help you turn a frown into a smile

He wouldn't ask for anything in return

He'll give you love that you need not earn

There are times that he couldn't make it

But rest assured in his thoughts you always fit

You'll mostly be fooled, pranked, and teased

But when you're M.I.A. you'll surely be missed

When you have doubts or you feel lost

He'll guide you through whatever it may cost

A true friend is similar to forever

He'll be there and he'll leave you, never

 

 

 

_Love, Actually Not_

From the top of the world you look at me

Not even a single little dot you see

A distance far and long to reach

A place where love and bliss exist

Taking a quick little glance at me

Feelings and thoughts collide and mix

Heart, mind, and soul, they flee

Away from this painful reality

You filled my world with joy and glee

Stripped me off my fear and frailty

More precious than anything extraordinary

Though in your heart it's someone else you see

You made me feel so calm and free

But I'm losing air and now I've come to see

You tore me apart, made me weak and weary

Despite all these, I still want you to be happy

 

 

 

_In Her Eyes_

shouting to the firmament

get me, fetch me, release me

from this mundane arrangement

raise me to enchantment

my Mr. Montague's waiting

in a place full of hating

with our hearts, we'll be running

away from nightmares unappealing

how much may we beg and plead

they never listen, never heed

twisted words they continue to feed

or poison us with sweet and deadly mead

in this earth we continue to rot

if we're not together in a knot

the blood in our veins, either they clot

or stain our clothes as a never-ending blot

I can't use my name Capulet

or even the most powerful amulet

they'll only accept my head as a bet

that romeo will not come back for Juliet

he returned before night turns day

but “I love you dear” he can no longer say

to the reaper, i've already lost the fray

and let the heavens claim our souls away


	4. a sprinkling of comedy

_I Found Someone Else’s Diary_

 

DISCLAIMER: There will be a great deal of ambiguity in these entries to evoke a false

sense of depth and profoundness, or universality, or whatever. Pick whichever fits you.

Also, I have no time for specifics. Specifics are gruesome and tiresome, and not to

mention gross.

 

Yeah about that… I’m a bit squeamish about specifics.

 

First journal entry

Twenty-third of November.

 

Monday.

 

It has been two thousand and fifteen years since we decided we should count the years in ascending order.

 

Is such a fact relevant to my story?

 

Not particularly.

 

So we move on.

 

I asked myself, why start now? What’s so special about this day? Nothing really. I just wanted to start something new. Not necessarily something right, because I haven’t really done anything extremely wrong to feel such a need to do something right. If anything, I’ve been doing mostly okay things. Mediocre. Unremarkable. Ordinary. I would change my name to “mostly okay, I guess” because it pretty much sums up my life.

 

How are you today?

Mostly okay, I guess.

 

How did you fare in that test the other day?

Mostly okay, I guess.

 

Describe your childhood in four words or less.

Mostly okay, I guess.

 

Or neutral. I could change my name to neutral.

 

This morning, I told myself that I’d try to do better. Not just okay, but better. I told myself not to be ruled by my usual lack of inspiration, but by greatness. Okay, maybe not greatness, that’s a little bit Napoleon-ish. Just, you know, be more inspired to do better work. And I was ready to do just that. Unfortunately, circumstance was not ready to do just that. More unfortunately, I’m willing to let it all slide and prepare excuses to go along with it.

And so that was it, another day left to waste.

 

Second journal entry

24th November.

 

Tuesday.

 

It was a little more productive than yesterday. Just a little. But otherwise, they were practically the same day.

 

I could’ve sworn it was déjà vu, but I know it really wasn’t. One good thing came off of it though. Direction. A murky and foggy kind of direction, but a direction nonetheless. And I took it because, you know how the saying goes, beggars can’t be choosers, yada yada yada.

 

 

So yeah, there, insignificant.

 

Third journal entry

25th November.

 

Wednesday.

 

I woke up feeling hopeful. #finally

…

 

This day seems better already. I’m not late for class, which is a big thing for me ‘coz I’m almost always late for everything. I’m feeling so good right now I even invited my friends to eat out for lunch. Hooray for friends eating out for lunch!

…

Lunch was great! I’m feeling so energized! I can do anything now!

…

…

…

Oh no. Oh no, not again. This can’t be happening again.

Distractions – 1

Self – 0

…

Okay, I’m trying to regain my footing. I can still do this. I still have time. I’ve done more with less time than this. I can still do this.

…

I can’t do this.

 

Remember the direction that I found yesterday? The murky, deep-in-the-woods type one? I followed it and now I’m kinda lost in it, Snow White style. And for someone with little to no sense of direction, that’s a very terrifying situation to be in. so I’m freaking out right now ‘coz I really don’t know what to do.

 

Anxieties are coming in, first as little ripples slowly washing over the ground on which I stand, then as tidal waves completely engulfing my body and soul.

 

I’m starting to drown.

 

Initialyzing hypoxia in T-minus 10 seconds, 9, 8, 7, 6, 5, 4, 3, 2, ...

 

Fourth journal entry

November 26.

 

The day just flew past me.

I cannot remember anything. Like at all.

 

This entry is as pointless as my existence.

 

Fifth journal entry

November 27.

 

Oh God I overslept! Why today of all possible days! Why?

…

Okay. I’m just a little late but it’s okay. Everything’s gonna be just fine.

…

Just when I thought things are going my way… of course it wouldn’t. That’s just how it goes.

My brain consists of like 90% frustrations right now. Ugh.

…

…

Ah what the heck. What’s done is done, I can’t change that. So now I’ll just relax and do

whatever that’ll make me happy.

#YOLO

 

That is, till the next thing that’ll frustrate me comes along.

 

Sixth journal entry

Saturday.

 

I thought I was gonna die tonight.

 

Since it is the weekend, I decided I’d go home, like to our real home. So yeah, I was on my way home right, I was riding this van. The van seemed sketchy even at the beginning but I still went in coz I’m gonna sit in the passenger’s seat anyway so the risk of riding it went down like two notches.

 

About twenty minutes in to the ride, I realized that the driver of the van is one of those that drive really fast. But it wasn’t unusual for a driver of their kind to be like that, so I tried to keep my shit together, I tired to keep calm. When we reached the expressway, that was when it really started to get scary. He was 10km/h above the speed limit, he was swerving left to right, he was overtaking most vehicles of every kind, and to make it all worse, the shoulder was his lane of choice. You know the one close to the edge of the road, the one close to the railings, the one you’re supposed to be on only in emergencies. Yeah, so I guess you get the picture. I was still trying to keep calm (or at least trying to act calm), but really I’m freaking out. In short, it was one hell of a ride, and not the good kind.

 

During all of that, I caught myself thinking “This is it then. This is the end of me. Dying in a car crash, riding a van, sitting beside a sleeping woman who kept on resting her head on my shoulder.”

 

How very fitting too, I was listening to the song Cemetery Drive when that happened. That part made it a little cool. But it made me a teeny bit sad too because no one can appreciate how funny that sounds because I’m dead and I’m not gonna be able to tell a story about it.

 

“I’m sorry Lord. Pardon me my sins please. I don’t wanna go to hell.” I said a little prayer, you know just in case that really was the last moment of my life.

 

But it wasn’t, and we survived. I’m still alive. Now I can tell a story of how frightening, and a little funny, my would-be death was.

 

And that is the story of how I met my untimely death…

that really wasn’t because I’m still alive, and that may have been just in my head and I was exaggerating because I tend to do that in stressful situations. Probably, that last part. Yeah.

 

Seventh journal entry

Sunday.

 

I slept all day.

I only woke up to eat and pee.

My kind of day.

 

Eighth journal entry

Sunday.

 

December 13.

It’s been two whole weeks since I last wrote.

 

A lot of things had happened; a lot of things had changed.

A lot of things also had stayed the same.

 

So again that was me being vague.

 

No but seriously, a lot of things happened, that’s why I haven’t, you know, been here for a while.

Unfortunately, things have been more on the unfortunate side of the spectrum.

 

First, there was the obvious damning thing that is the finals week – the real Nightmare Before Christmas – as I’d like to call it. Believe me, it was a real nightmare, coming from someone who doesn’t get a lot of REM sleep.

 

Also, I had of catching-up to do with my schoolwork. But I wasn’t successful with that either. So, just die, I thought. From that I realized that your past or your lies (both? either? neither?) could really creep up on you and bite you in the ass.

 

You’re probably wondering why I said that. Is there a story, a deeper meaning behind it?

Nope, nothing in particular. It just came to my mind is all.

 

 

 

You’re still stuck on that last part I said, huh?

Seriously, it’s just nothing. Let’s just move on please.

 

Okay… M O V I N G A L O N G…

 

Anyway, what else…

 

Oh yeah, there was that little bout of depression.

Haha I’m trying to say it like it was nothing.

 

Well okay, it wasn’t nothing, but it wasn’t anything too big either. I’m still here to tell the tale aren’t I?

Uhm wait, I won’t actually recount the tale okay. Like tell a full and detailed account of my episode of depression? No! I won’t get into specifics! What did I say about specifics? That they’re gross and that I’m squeamish about them right? Jeez! Why did I even put a disclaimer if you’re just gonna skip through it and ignore it altogether? Ughk.

 

Anyway, uhm… Sorry about that. It’s just that, it’s a sensitive topic and it’s still very fresh.

 

Oh wait, yeah, the sensitive topic is for the specifics and the fresh is for the depression thing. Sorry about the confusion.

 

[Sorry for saying sorry consecutively within a very short time interval.]

 

Uhm yeah, about the d-thing, maybe I can share it with you some time? I’m just not in the story-telling mood, I mean in that aspect.

 

Okay? Okay! Wow, you’re being very considerate (I’m just assuming here, as I can’t really tell if you are being considerate or not because I’m not with you while you’re reading this. That would be weird right?), thank you.

 

So that was that. Those are the things that consumed me these past few weeks, and I imagine you understand a little better why I haven’t written since then.

 

Now, that’ll change a little and I’ll a have a little more time to write because it’s Christmas break. Well actually I’m at the early stages of the Christmas break. I don’t know why I said that, I don’t know if that is really something worth noting.

I’m also at the early stages of being bloated. Just putting it out there.

Anyway, I guess what I was trying to say is, I’m not gonna give up. I will not give up.

 

Okay.

‘Til next time.

Bye for now.

 

 

 

_We Met At a Coffeeshop_

Hello there, he said.

Hi, she replied.

Are those your artworks. They’re good.

They’re awesome actually.

They’re just doodles. They’re nothing really.

But thanks, that means a lot.

Don’t thank me, I’m just telling the truth.

…

Anyway, uhm, can we be friends? If that’s okay…

Uh... sure.

But, why?

I don’t know, I guess I just like making new friends.

Okay, uh, if you say so.

Also, I kind of know you already.

Really?

How so?

We’re attending the same school right?

And our lockers are only a few feet apart...

Ah.

Well yes, you’re right.

And you're impossible to miss.

...

How about me, do you know who I am?

Uh yeah.

Like you said, we go to the same school.

And everyone knows who you are.

I guess that makes me lucky.

That you're popular?

No.

That you know me too.

Huh.

Smooth.

Is that how you get your girls?

No.

But I'm hoping it's how I will get you.

 

 

 

_Human Resources_

The interviewee was fresh out off college, so naturally, a job interview was bound to

happen.

Things were moving along just fine when THE question was finally raised...

Interviewer: So where do you see yourself in 10 years?

Interviewee: Uhm, well, I think I would be deep in the ground. Most likely

fertilizing it.

Interviewer: …

The interviewer gave a puzzled look.

The interviewer and interviewee exchanged a couple of painfully awkward glances

before the interviewee figured out what might have went wrong.

Interviewee: Oh. Oh no, I didn’t mean I’m already dead and decomposing in 10

years time. I wasn’t referring to fertilizing in that sense.

I just meant I’m actually putting fertilizer into the ground, as in planting. I’d

actually want to build my own garden.

Interviewer: …Okay.

The interviewer wrote something on the interviewee’s application papers while

glancing one last time.

Interviewer: Okay, thank you. You just wait for our call. Good day.

Interviewee: Okay thank you. Goodbye.

As the interviewee closed the door behind him, he thought to himself…

Interviewee: Huh. I think that went great. Now all I have to do is wait for their call.

 

 

 

_We Were Both Nervous_

Oh hey!

You came!

Take a seat.

Hey.

Thanks.

Yeah of course, I’m not the kind who ditches people.

Good… uh, good for me.

Err uhm…

I hope you like Italian.

Yeah I like guidos.

What? I meant food, Italian food.

I know.

I was just kidding.

[Gulp]

I’m sorry I think I’m acting a little weird.

I’m a little nervous, I’m sure you can tell.

Nah, you’re fine.

And anyway you’re not the only one who’s nervous.

Really?

You don’t look it, like at all.

You seem really calm.

No! I’m like freaking out!

Haha.

I’m just good at pretending I’m not.

Haha!

I envy your gift!

Gift?

Really?

Hmm…

Sure, I guess.

…

…

I’m really really happy you came.

Me too.

No, I don’t think you understand.

I mean, I know we’ve only just known each other for a while but…

I think…

I don’t know how to say this without sounding weird or creepy but…

I like you.

I like you a lot.

And you already make me happy. Like really happy.

No, I understand perfectly.

Bacause you already make me happy too.

…

…

Well then, I want to make you happier.

 

 

 

_Turkish Delight_

 

Do you know why it’s called Turkish delight?

 

<I don’t know. Why?>

 

I don’t know! That’s why I’m asking!

 

<Oh. I thought it was a joke or something.>

 

No, I’m genuinely asking.

 

<Oh… Hmm…>

 

Hmm…

 

<Well, maybe because calling it Turkish “Ughk what is this, is this some kind of taffy, ughk it’s kinda gross. Ughk… Hmm… Wait, it tastes weird at first but now I think I’m getting it, it’s growing on me; it’s sort of good, in a way. I think I like it, even though I still don’t know what it is. For all we know it could be jellied armadillo appendix. But I like it, whatever it is” is a little tedious, so they just called it “delight.” You know, like how it describes how you generally feel after eating it, while still being vague and encompassing. You know, an unspecified kind of joy.>

 

Hmm… Yeah, sure, I suppose.

 

<…>

 

But do you really think it’s jellied armadillo appendix?

 

<Maybe, maybe not. I don’t really know.>

 

…

 

<…>

 

 

Is it weird that I like something that may or may not be jellied armadillo appendix?

 

 

 

_We Know What Love Is_

I love him.

 

I was afraid to let anyone in, but I let him in anyway.

Maybe because somehow I know this is different.

 

It’s only been three months but I hope that he is the one.

I hope he’s the one that will make me happy.

I hope he’s the one that will make me laugh.

I hope when I go to far he doesn’t really get mad.

I hope that he likes the meals that I cook for him.

I hope that he can come up with more silly jokes.

I hope that he’d stick with a moustache or a beard, but not that weird goatee.

I hope that he thinks of me when he wakes up.

I hope that he thinks of me before he goes to sleep.

I hope he even thinks of me when his mind has drifted off.

I hope he’s the one that I see waiting at the end of the aisle.

I hope he’s the one holding my hand when I give birth to our child.

I hope he’s the one to comfort my parents when I reach the end of my lifeline.

I know some of the things I said are a little too much to ask.

But I do hope one thing is right; I really hope he’s the one.

I wonder if he’ll ever ask me to marry him.

I love her.

 

I didn’t know what it was before but I know it now like the back of my hand.

I’m sure this is love.

 

It’s only been three months but I already know she’s the one.

She’s the one that makes me happy.

She’s the one that makes me laugh.

Sometimes, she’s even the one that makes me mad

She’s the one that cooks my favorite meals.

She’s the one that laughs at my silly jokes.

She’s the one that hates my “weird” goatee.

She’s the one that I think of first when I wake up.

She’s the one that I think of last before I sleep.

She’s the one that I think of when my mind has drifted off.

She’s the one that I see when I picture an aisle.

She’s the one that I see carrying our child.

She’s the one that I see sobbing when I reach the end of my lifeline.

 

She’s everything to me.

And I want her to know that.

 

Tomorrow, I’m going to ask her to marry me.

 

 

 

_I Can Be Mushy If I Want To Be_

I don’t want us to be the greatest story ever told

I just want this to be the greatest love I’ve ever known

I don’t want to be the next Romeo and Juliet

Coz they’re stupid anyway and they die in the end

I don’t need something with picture-perfect quality

I just need something that’s based on reality

I don’t need other people telling us we look good together

I’d be content as long as we have each other

I’m not really wishing for a happily-ever-after

I just wish that in the future we won’t need divorce papers

But if ever we come to that, just remember honey

Don’t be cheap; I’m gonna need a hefty alimony


	5. a bucketload of traged

_A Little Disconcerting_

It was already late

But she was still wide awake

She stood up and walked around

Without needing to turn on the light

And she thought to herself

"Is it strange that I have a set of eyes

that are so accustomed to the dark?

Should I be concerned?

Should I be alarmed?"

So she just went back to bed

Even though she’s still not ready for sleep

 

 

 

_We Met at a Wrong Time_

She said no.

She said she wanted to say yes, and yet.

She said she thought she was ready, and yet.

I said no.

I thought for sure I’d say yes, but…

I thought I’d still say yes, but…

She said no, I get it, but we didn’t have to end it.

She said she only wants to spare me from the hurt.

She said it’s what’s best.

I…

I just wanted to save him, not let him get too hurt.

I could’ve just told him there’s someone else…

She told me I should just forget about her.

She told me that I deserved better.

She told me we still have the rest of our lives…

I know what the truth is, and it’s not what I told him.

I’m too broken to tell him that this is already the rest of my life.

 

I was told I was dying, I only have a couple of months left.

I couldn’t accept it at first, I said I was fine.

“I mean I don’t feel sick, I’m telling you I’m fine!”

I couldn’t be more wrong, I am not fine.

I am dying of cancer, stage 4, the usual suspect.

I couldn’t believe it, of all possible times why now?

Now that I am happy, that I have found the love of my life?

I guess fate is really cruel

It’ll call on tragedy then they’ll strike when you least expect it.

It’ll strike when you’re happiest, or when you think you have a lot of time.

I just wish I had the courage to talk to you sooner so we could have more time.

Or had you used one of those cheesy pick-up lines…

I guess that’s just it, we met at a wrong time.

 

 

 

The Sea

The thing about depression is it’s a lot like the sea.

One second you are just on the coast and then the next the water starts to creep up on you.

 

You barely notice it at first because it begins as small undulations surrounding the ground under your soles, but before you know it a tidal wave washes over you; it clutches on to your feet, gripping tighter and tighter and bringing you to its deepest, darkest trenches. Once there, all you can see is darkness, pitch-black darkness. You wouldn’t  recognize anything, not a wall, not a floor, not even your most familiar body part. On top of that, you can’t really breathe. It seems that your lungs forgot how they function. Your hands don’t work either; they’re just hanging there, not knowing which is the right and which is the left.

Oh and don’t get me started on your brain, it’s a much bigger mess. A mess so big it’s scary, scarier than the trench you’re in. To put simply, you’re stuck. You’re stuck and you don’t know how to get out. You just stay there, but you don’t know for how long.

 

There will be times that you think you see some light, some reflection. It gives you hope that maybe this is the day that you escape. But it isn’t, it’s just your mind playing tricks on you. You’re still down there, way below sea level.

 

But by some miraculous chance you are able to get out, it’s something short of divine intervention.

You climb out of that horrid pit that was holding you hostage, you float to the surface, and the current carries your still limp body to shore. And you lay there for some time until you know you’re fully recovered, even though you know you’ll never fully recover.

 

Then some people pass by, and they think you’ve just been hanging out on the beach all this time.

If only they knew.

 

 

 

_I_

I didn’t see it coming… I… How could I not have seen it coming?

 

I knew she couldn’t leave me just like that

I knew at least she reciprocated some of my feelings

My only regret is that I wasn’t there for her in her last hours

 

Goddamnit, there are many things I regret-

I regret that I tried to act cool before and pretend I didn’t know her

I regret that the truth is I was just too much of a coward

I really wish I’d approached her sooner only so we could have more time together

I wish we had more time, or at least she could’ve had more time

 

I never got to tell her a lot of things that

I would give her the world if not the universe

that I’ve never felt anything this overwhelmingly intense

that even though I’m afraid, for her, I would’ve faced everything

that just to have her beside me would’ve made me content

 

But she’s gone now, she’s never coming back

Fate took her away from me as quickly as when fate gave her to me

It’s unfair how time cheated us so bad

I would’ve rather she cheat on me and be alive

Than stay loyal to me but she’ll perish

 

But I guess that’s it, huh? There’s nothing else I could do

She’s gone and I’m the only one left to pick up the pieces

It’s almost as if Shakespeare wrote our story

The only thing missing is for me to swallow the poison

Even that would be a less grim demise

 

 

 

_Help_

A friend asked me to wake her up

I told her the cold, hard truth

sorry I can’t help you there

I can barely help myself

 

 

 

_The Dam_

Fo the longest time, I kept my worries to myself

They’re a lot like water currents, so I’ve built myself a dam

Sometimes the water is calm, but mostly they’re like tides

They push and pull on the very foundation my mind

The rain comes and goes, changes from a downpour to a drizzle

It would always leave a tiny crack, a chip, or a fracture

But there would always be sunshine after, giving time for me to mend

Unfortunately I got too comfortable, got too complacent

An ongoing torrent came and I never got to recuperate

By that point all the barriers shattered

Then came a deluge so strong it was worthy of a spot in Genesis

What comes next is what could only be described as a disaster

The water escaped, leaving only rubble in its tracks

It washed over everything I’ve worked for, everything that I've built

I thought I could avert, thwart, or forestall a game over

But I guess there's nothing left to do but for me to make a new beginning

Take a little break, plan ahead, then push the button to restart

 

 

 

_Animals_

I wish I were a cat

So whenever I fall

I’d always land on my feet

I wish I were a dog

So when I have doubts

I’ll just bury them to the ground

I wish I were an owl

So when I don’t like what I’m seeing

I could just turn my head around

I wish I were a turtle

So when things get too dangerous

I could retreat into my shell

I wish I were any other animal

So when emotions come rushing in

I won’t feel a thing ‘coz I’m not human

 

 

 

_Done_

It was night time

She thought she could go home before it appears

She turns, she shifts

But she could not escape it

It’s already here, that thing that she dreads the most

The only thing left to do is hide

No, she could not hide

She could only run until her legs hurt

Until she could run no more

Until she reaches a dead end

And then he called her name

No, it was more of a whisper

A tinny, chilly, airy whisper

It surpassed even the constraints of sound and speech

He made his presence felt beneath her skin

Beneath her layers of adipose, muscle, and nerve

Beneath even her bony framework

Then she thought to herself I’m done

She exhaled her last goodbye and inhaled her prayer

She wished along the gradient of hope

She yearned to be saved

But she knows she’s beyond that

Because she knows she’s done

 

 

 

_Chemistry_

I am chloroform

You are ammonia

 

All I seem to do

Is bring down people

While you, on the other hand

Make them more alive

 

I am sweet but

I am deceptive

You are strong and

Wildly forthright

 

This is the reason why

We could never work

We’re much too different

We’re far from alike

 

 

 

_The Note_

“We asked ourselves what for. A moment passed, then we just knew. We know the answer to the question that haunts us. But we know the answer will haunt us more...”

 

The words on the note bled. I'm only a by-stander but I can see red all over, I can almost actually taste it. It's not pleasant but it's not rancid either. Call me neutral, apathetic even, but I don't know them so I don't owe them pity. Then the anesthetic wore off and I remembered everything... The note in my hand bears my

handwriting. It's my turn to bleed.


	6. a bunch of baloney

Haikus

#1

In times such as these

Our prayers and faith, they keep

Us sane, safe, and clean

 

#2

Never say never

To what God can deliver;

His grace won't falter

 

#3

What should someone do

When in a meltdown or two

Pray, then start anew

 

#4

Trust is the lattice

With which we can survive this

And not hit or miss

 

#5

Panic is a sin

An enemy that stings, kills

It must be impaled

 

#6

We've been through a lot

But sadly there's more to come

So let's not give up

 

#7

Whatever happens

We'll always stick together

We can't be brought down

 

 

 

_And Then She Was Saved_

Desperation almost killed her. It's not just in her mind, it's what's lacking that got to her. The emptiness filled her chest. It grew, grew, and grew some more until it swallowed her. After all these times, she finally gave in, she finally imploded. Fortunately, thankfully, he saved her. He was able to draw her back to the earth. He didn't do anything but he did everything. He's not gravity but he's something bigger. Think of love, and make it a million times sweeter. Think of happiness, and make it a billion times grander. It's redemption. It's salvation. It's mercy.

 

 

 

Life as a Fangirl

_Commercialism, An Ode_

and then tyler said straight to my head

he'd always be there, though half dead

like the middle children of history

having nothing to hold on to but misery

having no purpose, no place

living in a world just trying to save face

expectations are not met

only disappointments beget

however horrible these truths are

unapologetic, unadulterated they are

they're something we couldn't deny or hide

we couldn't just put them aside

still we try to run

or delay the effects on our grandsons

they continue to grow and multiply

these mundane but gruesome lies

they smother us until our demise

it's the small things in our lives

that keep us going, keep us “alive”

like kisses, nods, hellos

like hugs from man-made appealing hoes

like soap keeping us clean

on the outside, or so it seems

because really we're never “it”

we'll never be cookie-cutter fit

no matter how hard we try

or even someday when we die

we'll never be sparkling clean

we'll only be joe's enraged spleen

 

 

 

_From Gallifrey to Trenzalore_

He’s a man who’s traveled a lot

Aboard a little blue box he'll trot

He hails from a land far away

A long-gone planet called Gallifrey

 

He stories say he’s the last of his kind

But i bet even then he’s one of a kind

Just ask any one of his companions

Best bloke ever, they’ll sing in unison

 

Don’t get me wrong, the guy’s not perfect

He’s got flaws like any other reject

Like superman, he’s got hero complex

And an ego bigger than Chiswick and Essex

 

In spite of his flaws you know he only means well

He'll guard the innocent from creatures that are fell

So beware you conniving two-faced evil-doers

Repent or else you’ll probably end up being goners

 

Even though his life’s full of adventure and lore

We all know how it ends, him being in Trenzalore

So in every stetsons, bowties, and in-house stores

Remember him dearly, our beloved Doctor

 

 

 

_From a Friend and Fellow Citizen of Gotham_

An outlaw

A crime fighter

An orphan

A lover

He's many things at once

But he's never a quitter

 

He puts righteousness first

And never the opposite

When the bad guys are lurking

He couldn't wait around and sit

He'll do just about anything

To try and clean up Gotham's shit

 

He's handsome

He's debonaire

He 's filthy rich

Heck, he's a billionaire

But beneath his unapologetic exterior

You'll know that all he ever does is care

 

He left his life of affluence and wealth

Gone missing and even thought to be dead

To put himself in someone else's shoes

Live a life of a criminal, that's my plan, he said

Not only to experience and to live in thrill

But to learn and be several steps ahead

 

He has it all but he feels there is a huge void

Because inside lies fear that is all-consuming

He trained and prepared himself for the worst

But the past kept coming back and it gets him reeling

He learned that he couldn't just face what terrifies him

Embrace the darkness, that's what he should be doing

 

So to his only family that's left, his city, he returned

Disguising as the the dark knight, some say the caped crusader

He rounds up the psychopaths, thugs, and criminals

He brings justice whenever the force can't deliver

Some say he's poison because he also brings havoc

But having Bruce – er Batman around, that's what I prefer

 

~From a Friend and Fellow Citizen of Gotham


	7. B.S.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (buttscript)

Yep, I like to make stuff up. One fine example is this BS; because i like treating books as bodies, and what are in the rear of bodies, BUTTS of course! Hence the name buttscript, a a script at the rear end. Ha! I'm funny and clever right? Right?

 

Anyways… Have you enjoyed reading this nonsense? Uhm, well, you don't have to answer that. (It’s called a rhetorical question if you're not aware. I’m not being condescending or anything, I just like preparing for the worst.)

 

But if you do wanna answer that, well tough luck, you can't really.

 

Okay that’s it, I've said all what I’ve wanted to say.

 

I wouldn’t want to keep you for too long.

 

Byeeeee!

 

 

 

Insincerely yours,

A.


End file.
